Okay, So I Bought a Butt Cream Off the Internet
Listen, I’m just as skeptical as you are. I was scrolling one night, probably after my third episode of some true crime doc, and this ad for West&Month Firming Buttocks Cream pops up. The before-and-afters looked… impressive. Too impressive. You know the ones. But my gym had been closed for weeks, and let’s just say my motivation was at an all-time low. So I thought, what the heck. For seventeen bucks, it was cheaper than a fancy coffee habit for a week. Worst case, I’d have a mildly perfumed lotion. Here’s what actually happened.
The First Impression Wasn’t What I Expected
I gotta say, the packaging is nicer than I thought it would be. It comes in this sleek, minimalist tube that doesn’t scream “BUTT CREAM!!” from your bathroom shelf, which I appreciate. The smell? Honestly, it’s fine. It’s a light, clean, slightly herbal scent from the maca root, not super perfumey. It fades pretty fast, which is good because who wants to walk around smelling like a creamsicle all day?
The texture is the real winner here. It’s this rich, thick cream—think whipped shea butter—but it sinks in surprisingly fast. No greasy, slide-off-the-skin feeling. You massage it in, and within a minute or two, it’s like you didn’t put anything on, except your skin feels stupidly soft.
Let’s Get Real About the “Firming” Claims
Here’s the thing. If you’re expecting this cream to magically lift and sculpt like squats never could, you’re going to be disappointed. That’s not how any topical cream works, and anyone who says otherwise is selling something. But. After using it consistently every day after my shower for about three weeks, I noticed a definite difference in texture and tightness.
My skin just felt… more resilient? Smoother for sure. The hydration from the shea butter and collagen is no joke. Any little dry patches or roughness were gone. And combined with that gentle daily massage, my skin just had a healthier, more toned look. It’s like when you moisturize your face really well—it doesn’t change the bone structure, but it plumps everything up and makes it look better. That’s the effect.
How It Stacks Up Against My Old Routine
I made a quick comparison chart because I’m a nerd and also because I know you’re not going to remember all this.
| What I Was Using | West&Month Cream |
|---|---|
| Basic Drugstore Body Lotion ($8) | Targeted Firming Cream ($16.99) |
| Just Moisturizes | Moisturizes + Improves Skin Texture |
| Thin, Watery Feel | Rich, Buttery, Fast-Absorbing |
| No “Active” Ingredients | Maca Root, Shea Butter, Hydrolyzed Collagen |
For the price jump, you’re getting a way more luxurious experience and ingredients that actually do something beyond just wetting the skin.
My One Gripe (Because Nothing’s Perfect)
Okay, my one complaint. The tube is only 3.4 oz. If you’re diligent about applying it to your… entire target area… twice a day like they suggest, this stuff goes fast. I’m talking maybe 3-4 weeks per tube. At seventeen bucks a pop, that can add up. I wish they had a bigger, more economical size. I’ve started just using it once a day (at night) to make it last, and I’m still seeing good results.
Honestly, the daily massage ritual is probably half the benefit. It forces you to take two minutes for some self-care, which we all need. Can you believe this is the most consistent I’ve been with any skincare step, ever?
The Final Verdict
So, is the West&Month Buttocks Cream a miracle worker? No. But is it a really, really good moisturizer that makes your skin look smoother, feel tighter, and overall just healthier? 100%, yes. It’s become a staple in my routine. If you go in with realistic expectations—thinking “luxurious skin treatment” not “butt-lift-in-a-bottle”—you’ll probably love it. Just maybe buy two tubes if you don’t want to reorder in a month.
